Why we criticize

You're not perfect, you know.  I know it may come as a shock, but you have flaws.  Of course, we all know that we have flaws, but we don't like to acknowledge it.  If we acknowledge that we are doing something wrong, then we have to either choose to fix it, or choose to leave it alone and pretend we don't know its there.

Typically what we do instead is to find the same flaw in another person, and criticize them for it.  Subconsciously, we are aware of the things we do that are less than ideal.  But consciously,  we don't really want to fix it.  Identifying flaws in ourselves and fixing them is hard work.  It can take a long time and a lot of effort to adjust our behavior, and most of us don't want to do that much work.

But when we criticize others, we're really just trying to take the spotlight off ourselves and put it on someone else.  The more critical a person is of others, the more insecure they are about their own self.

Think about it the next time you find yourself being critical of another person.  Does their behavior really matter?  Why exactly is it bothering you?  Look inside yourself and see if you see your own flaws in that person, and it bothers you.

It takes a lot of work to do this, which pretty much shows that its the right thing to do.  But if you are willing to put in the time, and to take personal responsibility for your own behavior, you'll find that you enjoy your life a lot more.  Personally, I think that being happier is worth the effort.