The past is an anchor

How often do you drive along in your car, mile after mile, looking only in the rear view mirror?  You don't do that because it means you're not paying attention to what's happening in front of you, and you'll crash.  So why does it seem okay to go along day after day, looking back at your life?  Doesn't it seem like you should be paying attention to what is happening in front of you?  Don't crash your life.

Do you know what you have in life?  You have this moment right now.  You have this day you're living.  The past is how you got to this point, but it no longer has any control over you.  Let it go and live your life today.  I'm not suggesting that you should forget life lessons, or forget mistakes you've made.  Rather, choose to learn the lessons, use them to make today a better day, and then let them go.

Let me tell you about a personal experience.  A few years ago, after my divorce, I was looking back at a lot of my life, in hopes that it would help me put the pieces back together.  Specifically, I wondered what affect it had had on me as an adult that my parents were in a cult the whole time I was growing up.  I wanted to know how that experience had changed my life.  What parts of me came from growing up in a cult, and what parts were just me?

I went to Denver to a conference for cult survivors, and met with adults like myself who had grown up in cults.  I talked with some people about getting into counseling.  Then when I came home, I realized something.  That path that I took, even though it wasn't a path that I had chosen, led me to who I am today.  There is no way to go back and change any of it.  None of it will ever be different than it was.  It's impossible to separate out any parts of my past.  I am the sum of those experiences.  

I chose to let it go.  I chose to accept that all of the experiences in my life, both good and bad, are just parts of me today.  And I work every day to be a good person today.  I like who I am today, which means that the path that got me here must have been okay.

Look back, see what happened, then make the choice to live this life today.  Don't let your past crash your present.